Today I want to talk about one of my profound meditation experiences — the experience of God.

Before we begin

This subject matter is quite controversial in the modern world, because there are so many beliefs and opinions about everything.

People all around the world believe in God, or no-God, and so they have formed ideas, judgments and opinions around this ‘thing’ called God, while really not knowing anything about God at all.

I don’t believe in God. Nor do I believe in no-God.

In this article will be revealed why.

Nevertheless, I want to continue to share with you what can really be known — as I do here on medium.

So I’m going to talk about God now, for I have truly met God within me.

When I say I’ve met God, I mean that this is direct. I am going to communicate this experience to you now, so that you are inspired to look deeper within yourself and one day be able to confirm — because this reality is in everyone.

Yet I realize, that what I’m going to say, is so out there for so many people, that I really cannot hope anyone is going to get this. However, ‘getting it’ is not so important.

What is important is the energy of what I’m going to say.

That will work in you nonetheless and impart to you something that is beyond understanding, because in a very deep place inside of you, you already know what I’m talking.

On a last remark before we begin, I want to encourage you to read:

The true nature of meditation experiences” (7 min read), &

My personal journey towards spiritual awakening” (5 min read).

Although all my articles have their aspectual values in bringing you closer to this idea, these two in particular will serve to answer some of the questions you may have regarding this experience and clear up some doubts.

The outset of the experience

I want to tell you first a little about the outset of this occurrence.

The experience itself happened during meditation, when I intentionally designed to go deeper within myself.

That was during an intensive 10-day meditation period, where I would commit myself to doing nothing but inquire into my own true nature all day for 10 days straight.

This included contemplation, observation, meditation and just staying conscious and being with this truth as much as possible.

The experience I’m going to tell you about now occurred about 6 days in, when I was sitting down for meditation, after about 20 or 30 minutes.

I cannot quite say how long this state of direct God experience lasted, but I would assume about a couple of minutes, because when I opened my eyes again and seemed back to normal, my surroundings still looked pretty much the same (position of the sun and all).

Now let’s get into this.

The entrance

I’m sitting in meditation.

Increasingly I’m mustering more and more willpower or focus or one-pointedness or stillness or whatever you want to call it.

This took some time and was perceived as effort, because everything in time is effort and so is the breaking away of false identity through stillness.

My eyes are closed, but in front of me I can see this blue shaped something. It kind of looks like a fractal or one of those mandalas. It’s only later that I realized that what I was seeing at that moment is the ‘eye of God’.

This eye of God is the entrance.

It’s sort of blue on the perimeter and more light towards the center, but it’s also ever changing in front of me.

I sense it’s pulling me on.

I get the knowledge that it’s pulling me on, but also I realize I can only overcome this contradiction by being stiller.

The contradiction is the effort in me. There’s still a great sense of effort in me trying to seduce me away from the stillness, so that I would give in to the effort and cease my endeavor.

Then in what seemed like a last effort attempt I suddenly found myself sufficiently still — how still I cannot possibly say, but all of a sudden this blue eye of God had appeared to swallow me and I was gone.

All effort was gone. The universe was gone.

It can only be God

And I am here.

Suddenly I am in this place.

What is this place?

It is no place.

The universe had just disappeared. From this place I watch the destruction of the universe.

Before me the universe had just been destroyed, and I am here.

I get the knowledge:

This is God. And I am God in this place.

And I get the knowledge:

I’ve been here before — even though it’s the first time I am here.

And I realize:

This is where I shall go when my body dies.

Then I watch the creation again.

The universe is created, yet remaining uncreated.

I’m still in this place.

The universe is in a superposition of simultaneous and instantaneous creation and destruction. This place is beyond the effect of the universe.

In no time the universe is created, and in no time it is destroyed.

This place, as it appeared to me, is purple in color. It looks like purple pearls along a two dimensional array in infinite space. These pearls could be described as atoms, or maybe that’s where the idea of the atom comes from.

Why two dimensions I cannot say. Perhaps that was just the way the knowledge was imparted to me. It does not matter.

The knowledge is in a different dimension from these images that I’m describing. The knowledge is much more direct. It is as myself. The images are more superficial.

Then suddenly these purple pearls (or atoms) begin to move, whereas before they were completely still. It’s as though a drum had been hit and the sound excited these pearls into vibration.

They gain in velocity very, very rapidly until they are so swift they excite themselves into another state, they disappear and the universe is created — all the while these pearls remain completely still, unaffected.

This place is beyond affection — but not beyond love, because this is love.

The knowledge

Eventually I would come out of this state and find myself back in existence, back to normal.

Only one thing had changed:

I now know there is no death.

I now know there is this place where I survive physical death, and that this place is no distance from here.

I’ve also seen the causal event that gives birth to the universe every moment, how it is created. I’ve seen for myself that the universe is literally vibration.

I realize the creation is now, not some time ago like the scientist thinks the Big Bang occurred billions of years ago. No. It is happening now every moment.

No formalism can ever get to that state, bring you closer to the reality, knowledge or direct experience of it.

In the beginning indeed there is the sound, as it is said. The sound is the initial movement that occurs within the stillness and gives rise to the universe. That is now.

And I don’t believe in God, for God is absolutely unbelievable.

This place is beyond belief and beyond doubt.

If you think you can believe in God, or anything, then you are fooling yourself.

The only thing is: This knowledge had been imparted to me unconsciously.

This means I’m not yet able to hold this knowledge as my living experience at any moment. It is now in my memory, a glimpse.

The experience was beautiful beyond description.

Nothing anybody has ever experienced in the world is greater than it.

But it was only an experience of God, a facet of God. Even though it was God and I was God, it is not God.

The experience may not come again. I don’t mind.

I only tell you this to break up in you what you think you know, so you can be real in yourself, and have more and more intimations of reality.

God is the reality.

Closing words

So now you see how deep each and every one of us goes.

We are not mere individuated bodies moving around, doing what we please. There’s a higher power inside.

— an intelligence that is not the usual intelligence of human thought, but the intelligence of the spirit.

And that is what I’m trying to communicate to you in ever finer detail in these articles to cover every area of your life — so that you become more aware of your true nature.

The experience I’ve communicated to you now occurred about 2 months ago.

Since then I’ve continued to grow in wisdom, self-knowledge and being. I say this, because I don’t want you to seek out any particular experience, because that is willfulness.

Everything happens at its appropriate time.

Trust in that.


Thank you for reading.

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